ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ETIQUETTE OF SOCIAL DANCE (part 3)
Shortly after starting Your dance career, You will encounter most of the “regulars” who form the basis of the local dance community. Dance communities, as a rule, are not particularly numerous. Dance community can be seen as a family, and its members as family members. Friendship comes and goes after a while, and family forever. That is why maintaining relationships within the family is very important: not many of us ever choose new parents or new brothers. If the relationship in the family is spoiled, the consequences will be long and painful. Therefore, it is worth making an effort to maintain good relationships in the dance community, because while dancing in the same geographical area, You will encounter the same people again and again will constantly arise awkward situations.
Prevent unpleasant situation easily, especially because, that most dancers – good-natured, good people. Just do not aggravate relations with anyone and follow social norms. Despite this, there are some situations in which dancers tend to aggravate relations.
One of these slippery situations involves dance etiquette. Everyone seems to agree with the etiquette of the dance, but there are variations in how people apply it in practice. When You see that someone, in Your opinion, violates the etiquette of the dance, You may have a desire to come up and Express your opinion about it. Or at least try to politely point out the error. Do not give in to this temptation!
It is very difficult and virtually impossible to change people. Few of us have that magical combination of tact, understanding, and charm to be able to change someone’s behavior in the best possible way. But not many people have such a set of qualities and You are likely to fail. In addition, You will look stupid and annoying from the side. The exception is if You want to tell a close friend and feel obliged to help him out. In this case, such a conversation should be tactful and confidential. If in General: etiquette – Yes! To the supervision of observance of etiquette – no!
Does this mean that the violation of etiquette should go unpunished? Of course not. Etiquette has a wonderful self-regulation mechanism. The person who flagrantly and repeatedly violate the etiquette, you begin involuntarily to escape and he remains in the side. Thus, the problem is solved by itself.
In some cases, direct intervention may be necessary, especially when the offender places others in serious immediate discomfort or danger. Then it should come not from the average dancer, but from someone more official, such as an organizer or a DJ. In this case, it is very important that the rules are interpreted unambiguously and clearly. Your work is finished as soon as You have brought the violation to the attention of the organizer or DJ.
Dance and novel
Pair dance by its nature is a romantic action. It includes music and the immediate proximity of partners of the opposite sex. For most of us it is very attractive in dance. Where else can we feel the closeness of a handsome stranger touching You with his hands, a few seconds after the meeting? However the link dance and novel can, unfortunately, also lead to misunderstanding and frustrating situations.
Much of this misfortune can be avoided by understanding the basic principle of social dancing. Social dancing is communication. Once again, as an example, let me give you a metaphor: the dance is like a brief conversation at a reception, after which we go on to the next conversation. Each of these conversations can be fun, professional, elegant, or provocative. However, this is only a brief conversation, pleasant at the moment, but certainly not hinting or forcing long-term interaction.
The same principle applies to social dance: Every dance is a communication, and hopefully a pleasant, social interaction. It can be difficult for new people to understand that a dance does not necessarily indicate a personal interest in a person, even if it looks passionate or provocative.
Dance is fun, imagination, fantasy. A separate dance may look like a delicate, provocative or sexy, but it’s only roleplay. Social dance party is a safe area where you can play these games and have a degree of free fun with the understanding that our movements on the dance floor, especially during the dance, should not be interpreted in terms of the standards of the outside world.
The mutual understanding of the dance community makes this level of entertainment possible. Our steps in the dance do not continue after this. To take seriously what is happening on the dance floor would be a mistake.
Two aspects of this mistake, which can be particularly harmful: the first is to misunderstand the partner’s attention and mannerisms, while dancing, as a genuine romantic interest. While novels are indeed present in the dancing community (as elsewhere), one must be careful about any assumptions. Then You will be able to protect yourself from inconvenient moments, or, even worse, aggravation of relations with the partner/partner.
The second aspect of this problem involves romantic partners who both dance. Here again it is necessary to understand that the dance – it’s just playing roles, and what is happening on the dance floor – it’s not reality. Each of them should not be shy to dance with others. By understanding this, they can avoid pain and suffering, and build stronger relationships.
Despite the fact that a large part of the dance – a fantasy and a sham, and that many of the dancers shared their dancing and romantic life, nothing against search of the novel in the dancing circles. If this is Your goal, all the best to You! Do not forget to learn along the way dance and have fun.